I wish I could refuse to tell you about the things I hold so close to my chest. I’ll keep telling you that I’m trying my best. I give to the darkest of thoughts a room and they never check out. you will believe the lies. you think I’m different, good. that makes me want … Continue reading “Bite Your Tongue.”
Watcher, Watching, and Watched
I sit there and look out. Sometimes I feel like I am not actually me, that I am someone inside of a vessel. The person playing a first-person shooter game. And to be honest, I feel that way as well. I feel as if that since I don't feel "grounded" to my person, I don't … Continue reading Watcher, Watching, and Watched
Shame on You
Shame on you for knowing her.Shame on you for talking to her.Shame on you for her smell. You know you can avoid it.Shame on you for keeping her smell. You took it. Give back her power. Shame on me for trusting you.Shame on me for believing in you.Shame on you for teaching you about a … Continue reading Shame on You
Anger.
I am going to lose my mind. Explosive rage is not the type of emotion I really possess. No, this is something slowly burning. And I think I have reached a boiling point. Will it burn you? No, but it will burn me, I promise you that. I’m not good at being angry with anyone … Continue reading Anger.
Bed Sheets
The very first time I bought my own bed sheets, I was nineteen. I know that this specific title is definitely going to make you think I am about to talk about sex. I just want to get that out of the way. I’m not here to talk about that, because while it’s something I’m … Continue reading Bed Sheets
Space
I have a bad habit of not working well without boundaries.It's nothing specific to me that caused me to be this way. Growing up, I always had boundaries that I established to make sure I can be the best "me" that I can be. This didn't really apply to any specific context or anything, but … Continue reading Space
follow the double lines
I have to remind myself that I am safe. I know where I’m going, I know that I have to know that. See, people are counting on me. I’m not allowed to make the same mistakes, and, believe me, every mistake possible has been made. If I feel myself growing distracted, if I lose my … Continue reading follow the double lines
The End
I think about dying a lot. A lot more than a healthy person should.Sometimes, I sit and daydream about how everything will end. How I will go out and die. Will I fall off of a cliff to my death, bouncing off of the ground as my bones snap like twigs? Or will I just … Continue reading The End
Frost Bitten
The cold is approaching once again. I feel the weight of all the decisions I’ve made this past year piling like snow on cold asphalt. So many thoughts race through my head and it makes me wish I could freeze my mind as I watch the rain hit the ground through my room or car … Continue reading Frost Bitten
Working Stiff
Having a job, to me, didn't seem like a "big" thing. I mean, what I am trying to say is that what I thought of a job was simple. You clock in, do your stuff, and leave. Nothing more, nothing less. B O Y, am I wrong.I started working my first job about two years … Continue reading Working Stiff
Feeling Drives Work 